And this is one I wrote in response to the one my sis wrote (I know, I also need to get a life) lol


All nice and secure inside my mummy
Then all of a sudden comes the rumbling of her tummy
I feel myself being pushed along
Now feel in a place where I don’t belong

Through narrow passages and tubes so tight
Something here just don’t feel right
More speedily now my travels appear
The end is in site I feel it so near

The grunts and groans that leave her lips
As I follow the course with all its dips
Now a light appears at the end of the tunnel
But what is this it looks like a funnel

I find myself being expelled at speed
My mummy has done the dirty deed
Down I splash, the water is cold
Now where do I go, I was never told

The tissue falls on top of me
All I know, is I have to break free
That bend is now looking so inviting
So I swim for that, this is so exciting

Without even a wave, I dive and now gone
Not even a letter to say dear John
I am off to a place much nicer and newer
In the brochure I think they called it the sewer

Ghost Turd

This one was written by my sis (I know, she needs to get a life) lol

The feeling grows as you sit and wait
Not just yet, to sit in state
Plenty of time before the mighty arrives
Plenty of time before those sighs

Walk a little, ponder at life
This pleasurable experience for husbands and wives
Small tiny babies, toddlers all
They all learn when nature calls

There, now, its time has come
To take the seat , expose the bum.
The best feeling a person has
As you sit and squeeze to let it pass.

Nothing feels greater as you excavate
The inners of your self and wait
To peer at the mighty job
That feels as huge as a ten ton log

But wait, what’s this where has it gone
The thing that took you all morning long
To expel from your body, the stink is there,
But where oh where oh where oh where?

Straight down the pan and round then bend,
Is that it is that then end?
The clean up now, as the disappointment shows
Glaring at the pan as the water flows

For a moment you wonder, did this thing just go
As you try not to feel so darn low
You know it happened for the splash you heard,
Or was it again, just a ghost turd

The work you do is done in silence
The things you see include such violence
You give so much and no-one sees
Despite petitions and many pleas

You gave your country many years
But all that now falls on deaf ears
Recognition at least will be a good start
It’s over to our government to now take part

Ex army now as you can guess
The higher powers now need to address
You sacrificed so many years
And put aside your heartfelt fears

But now you feel like you’re alone
And hurts you to the very bone
A pat on the back a shake of the hand
A simple thanks for protecting the land

The Beach

Imagine the sea and the golden sand
As we walk along the shore, hand in hand
We stop and look out to the open sea
You kiss me so softly, I can hardly breath

My mind in turmoil, this has to end
I say in my mind you are just my friend
Your hands starting caressing, with much desire
You touch my soul, my skin is on fire

To touch the untouchable, to kiss the lips of fate
Will good verses bad, be truly worth the wait
I throw caution to the wind and say I don't care
For whenever I look at you, you are beyond compare

My heart beats faster as it picks up pace
As I place soft kisses upon your face
My body trembles with anticipation
When I look up to you with adulation

You stroke my body tenderly
I arch up for your caress
Your hands explore me deep inside
With a rhythmic movement, they begin to glide

As you hear my womanly sighs
I show you the delight, between my thighs
I moan in pure desire, as I pull your hand away
As lovely as it was, I now need some passionate play

I straddle your awaiting body
I ease you in with not a moment too soon
As my hips get into a rhythm
Your thrusting hips must stay in tune

Our bodies are now awash with desire
As we slowly but surely put out the fire.
Together we make love, moaning as if we are one
Enjoying the pleasures and being engulfed by the fun

The Lonely Man

Each night I see before me, a face up in the clouds
Wonder if I could find this man, so lost in all the crowds
He wanders around aimlessly, so lost in thought and scared
Thinking to himself weather people really cared

So alone and afraid to sleep through the night
The dreams start to haunt and give him a fright
So endless nights of tortured sleep and restless nights ahead
He attempts to stay awake instead of going to his bed

Eyelids getting heavy now fatigue he fights no more
Awareness lost as sleep beckons, as he closes the bedroom door
His fears start to take hold fast
Memories remind him of his turbulent past

His agitated body now lays upon the bed
Disturbed sleep and dreary thoughts are now inside his head
Twitching and fidgety, he ties to lay there still
Haunting images and lasting memories, inside his mind they fill

With only a few hours to go before this nightmare will come to an end
And first thing in the morning his mind will try to mend
Erase the memories of the previous night and all his terrible past
And set about getting some good memories, one’s that he’ll make last

Each night I see before me, a face up in the clouds
Wonder if I could find this man, so lost in all the crowds
He wanders aimlessly around, so lost in thought and scared
Thinking to himself if people really cared

Spider Fear

I am not so fearsome or even scary
Look at me close I am cute and hairy
More legs than you I’ve got that’s clear
But look in my eyes and you’ll see more fear

I know I just want to make you puke
At this present time I don't seem so cute
The hairs on your body seem to stand upright
Feeling nervous and so uptight

I am so tiny compared to you
Don't mean to scare you with the things I do
So take your time and get to know me
Your feelings of fear I just hope to set free

Your initial reaction is to run and hide
To scream the house down and have me fried
Or get a shoe and kill me flat
No more fears and that will be that

But I hope one day you’ll allow me to stay
And maybe even watch me play
The webs I spin are so unique
My busy life is never bleak

I won’t trouble you if you don’t trouble me
This promise I hope to which you agree
Just be aware as I’m on the ground
Please take care as you go walking around

Not Alone

When you go out each day, I’d like to be
Your very own personal security
I am your invisible bodyguard
As I know your job is extremely hard

When night falls and the light has gone
I’ll be the light where the sun once shone
When fear steps in, I’ll be your hope
And help in conditions where you couldn’t cope

I’ll share the pain that your eyes can see
And help your heart once again be free
Will make sure you are never alone
I’ll be there always spurring you on

You are a man who can see what’s wrong
I’ll help you emotionally until you are strong
Just hold my hand and squeeze it tight
Then loosen your grip when you feel things are right

But up until then, my pledge to you is
Each day I’ll send you a special kiss
Close your eyes and think of me
Right by your side, that’s where I’ll be

Missing You

Several times a day this man enters my head
Weather I am in the bath or lying on my bed
He interrupts my thoughts, and plays havoc with my mind
This man I see before me, who is so very kind

I find him so intriguing, and good to be around
He gets me feeling on a high, but feet still on the ground
Ever since I’ve known him, this cosy glow I feel
This hardened shell around me, you gently begin to peel

The way you make me feel right now
Is something to admire
You have set my heart alight
And make me feel on fire

I see your face with that wonderful smile
Time spent with you is so worthwhile
You are so far away, yet somehow in my reach
Could praise you all night long, in a very sincere speech

The closeness we have, we you are on leave, I hate to see you go
The sadness I feel when you go back, I try not to let it show
My heart it feels so very heavy, and starts to miss a beat
These feelings I have to push aside, I won’t give in to defeat

I have to look forward, to our next time together
And sail through the storms in which we can weather
To hold you so tight and have you so near
When you’ll make me feel safe and take away the fear

Togetherness

Disturbed sleep, such sheer pleasure
Sexual arousal, behaviour sinful

Hold each other close skin to skin
Tensions build such passions high

Butterfly kisses on moistened lips
Tongues dancing around, such tender kisses

Rousing, rampant, fiery desires
Shameless groans, glossy skins

Slow tender movements
Deep breaths awash

Lost in thought as desire takes over
Pure silk upon our moistened skins

Passions takes hold
All senses abandoned

We feel our pleasures rise
Bodies now take full control

Wrapped up in each other as if we are one
Baited breath, as you enter within

Each movement, every thrust
Our bodies tremble and quiver

In waves of enormous ecstasy
Our breathlessness conveys

Such momentary pleasure
Only to be shared when we are together

Waiting

I sit here each night and think of you
And all the things I’d like to do
These thoughts rush round inside my head
My heart now alive, though I thought it was dead

You have put that smile back on my face
Now for me, it’s a one man race
My heart can again begin to trust
In any relationship, this is a must

You make me feel like a teen with a crush
These warm feelings inside give me such a rush
Each and every contact with you makes me feel content
This is so right that it cannot be wrong it feels like it is meant

The month of September will be so great
Though I’ll be more nervous, than our first date
Just being in your arms would feel so right
Skin to skin contact all through the night

And when we awake, your face I would see
A warm glow alights inside of me
Here at last so close to touch
All these things I want so much

Alone with my thoughts

So alone without my man
Would love to see him if I can
But he is very far away
In a place unsafe to stay

I want to feel his presence near
This wonderful man who is so dear
To let him know how much I care
My feelings for him, I want to share

So scared to commit to a man so far
Who is still fighting an invisible war
Can my heart take, this turbulent road
All sorts to think of, a heavy load

So I sit each night and think
Hours pass and I begin to blink
Each night I fight a constant battle
Until my brain begins to rattle

I want to make this work, I say
But that’s not easy day by day
Though I am grateful for the times we had
The time spent alone makes, me so sad

First Meeting

It all started off with a nice little tag
A few emails here and a little chin wag
Your first picture I saw, I thought wow very nice
What can I say to break the ice

So I just said hello, how is your night
Nothing to scary to give you a fright
We got talking about the small things
With each little message, our excitement begins

You came to my house for our very first meet
I was so nervous, I could hear my heart beat
You stepped out your car and knocked on the door
I thought he’s nice, I definitely want more

We went to a pub for a chat and some food
Getting to know you was really good
Wanted to kiss you as we said goodbye
Being with you, I felt on a high

Our chats since you got back to Iraq
Just makes me want to have you back
I yearn to have you close to me
These lustful feelings set so free

I sleep at night with you on my mind
In my dreams it’s you I find
I want to feel your touch, your kiss
Sending us both into heavenly bliss

I need you so much, I can feel my desire
You make my heart feel like it’s on fire
Such happiness you bring to my body and soul
You make me feel completely whole

I want to make love to you all night long
It would feel so good, it couldn’t be wrong
These feelings you have stirred are a welcome surprise
You are just so perfect in this woman’s eyes

War and Fear

Experiencing reality on a personal note
When the mortars come over, it isn’t a joke
The sirens go off, it’s time to take cover
Laying there wondering when it will be over

But so often he hears that siren sound
Just can’t be arsed to get to the ground
Instead turn over and go back to sleep
Too tired to think if his life he will keep

In his mind, it’s what he needs
Those warning sirens he always heeds
But fuck you, you arseholes, you will not win
It’s you who’ll end up living in sin

You are the ones trying to dictate
So now the locals begin to hate
Just for once he urges you to try
To find some peace and pacify

This will be the only way
For all concerned and have their say
One fanatic should not hold all the cards
And have their rules with all their guards

How unfair and sad is that
That people on all sides don’t get to bat
No matter how small a person may seem
Morals and values you should never redeem

War is war and will always be there
But our stories and lives we should always share
At the end of the day, it is good verses bad
The ones that can’t see that,are the ones that are mad